I’m So Not Ready For This

I wrote this post as a guest post for someone that no longer blogs and it was never used.
It’s a couple months old but I think it’s one that should not be ignored so I’m sharing.


So my oldest finished first grade a couple weeks ago.

Right before school ended she told me a boy liked her.

After school ended we had this conversation…

Monkey: I can’t wait until I’m in 6th grade.

Me: Why?

Monkey: Because then I can have a boyfriend.

Me: Say what?

Monkey: A boyfriend.

A pause where I start to think the conversation is over.

Monkey: How old were you when you had your first boyfriend?

Me: 25.

Monkey: No you weren’t.

Me: Okay, I was 24.

Monkey: Mmmmoooottttthhhhhheeeerrrrrrr

Me: Fine, I was in 6th or 7th or 8th grade.

Really it was probably more like 2nd grade but no way I will ever tell my child that.

Monkey: I can’t wait until I’m in the 6th grade.

Me: Wait till your father hears about this.


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Hi and welcome! My name is Jessica Torres and I'm a homeschooling mom of two adorably insane girls on the path to greener living. I'm also self declared iPhone addict and lover of all things Apple. When not attached to my kids, my iPhone, or my laptop, you can find me creating cocktail recipes. Subscribe by RSS Feed or by email to join in the fun over here.

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114 Responses to I’m So Not Ready For This

  1. MamaTrack
    Twitter: MamaTrack

    Yikes. I’m not ready either! Run, hide. Better yet, hide her. That’s the answer.
    MamaTrack recently posted..Happy Hour

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      Hide her is right. But then that might involve homeschool and I don’t think I can handle that either.

  2. Jessica
    Twitter: Spitupchronicle

    Hahahaha! SO cute! I wasnt allowed to have a boyfriend until I was 15. My dad was such a jerk to the first guy I brought home that I was always embarrassed to introduce guys to him. My hubby and my dad instantly got along–thats how I knew he was Mr Right. :)

    If we ever have a little girl–Hubby will probably lock her up until shes 30.
    Jessica recently posted..#MomFail

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      I know my husband will be less than nice to any boy that dates our kids. It should be entertaining. At least to me. I’m sure my girls will be so unhappy about it.

  3. Alison@Mama Wants This
    Twitter: MamaWantsThis

    I wanted to smack boys round the head when I was 12. At 13 they were just an annoyance. From 14-17, total idiots and I was not impressed. I only had a boyfriend at 17 1/2. Yeah late bloomer. *ahem*

    I imagine John was NOT impressed, haha.
    Alison@Mama Wants This recently posted..Foodie Friday: Chocolate Olive Oil Bread

  4. Stephanie
    Twitter: supermomboots

    I was not allowed to date until I was 16. Which was fine for me because I was EXTREMELY shy until about 15 anyway and the opportunity never came up. My sister on the other hand…well I should probably keep those stories to myself so as not to scare you further!
    Stephanie recently posted..What happens when your child discovers your camera phone!

  5. Jamie says:

    I’ll have do to this two at a time! My husband is already panicky about it and they aren’t even a year old!!! I’m counting on you to keep us posted on how it turns out!
    Jamie recently posted..#iPPP | beach bound

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      Ha! I’ll do my best to keep you posted. I’m pretty sure over here a shotgun might be involved in answering the door a time or two.

  6. Natalie
    Twitter: corp2domestic

    I don’t even want to think about girlfriends for my little boy…not until after college, right? :)
    Natalie recently posted..It’s The Simple Things in Life–Long Week Edition

  7. Amy
    Twitter: jamcadventures

    Thinking of my boys having girlfriends is way too scary! I don’t look forward to that.

  8. I don’t think I’ll mind the girlfriends and such while Monkey’s in school unless they’re vapid twits. Then we’ll have to talk. :)
    Julie @ mamamash recently posted..Dear Russell Brand:

  9. Roxanne says:

    I’m not ready either. But I think boys get to it later than girls, RIGHT?

    Of course, T is still at this weird age where he says I’m going to be his girlfriend.

    Roxanne recently posted..Princess Preemie Primer

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      I have no idea when boys and girls start to get it.

      It’s so funny when kids want their parents to be their boyfriends/girlfriend. I think they grow out of that stage pretty quick.

  10. Grumpy Grateful Mom
    Twitter: grumpygrateful

    That’s so funny and cute and scary! I think our daughters are all too similar. I will never give in! I was definitely 25. :)
    Grumpy Grateful Mom recently posted..Toddler Professions

  11. Dr. G
    Twitter: AskDocG

    So the thing that impresses me most about this is that your strong-willed child took the boundary at face value. She did not try to argue why she should be allowed a boyfriend now, or sooner than 6th grade. She is looking forward to it, but she really respects (even likes I think) your line in the sand. Way to go Mom!
    Dr. G recently posted..Help! I’m Going Back to Work!

  12. Sweaty
    Twitter: dosweatthesmall

    My daughter’s in first grade!!! Gosh please don’t tell me I’m gonna be having this conversation any time soon. SO NOT READY for this.

    Last christmas, my daughter came home with a Santa’s list that the each student in her class had to write. One of them said: “Real boyfriends.” Naturally, I freaked out. THAT led to a one-hour speech about the benefits of NOT having boyfriends until you’re 30.

    Sweaty recently posted..Are You Smarter Than a First Grader?

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      I hope your daughter doesn’t start thinking about boys until much later than first grade.

      I would have been so freaked out if I saw that my kid wanted a real boyfriend on her Christmas list.

  13. Leigh Ann
    Twitter: latorres

    Ha ha ha so funny! I was in 5th grade, but I wouldn’t let him kiss me or anything. I was a prude.
    Leigh Ann recently posted..Rule 15: Keep Your Eyes on the Prize

  14. Jackie says:

    Haha! I started dating when I was 15 years old. I thought that was pretty late.

    But, I’m so not ready for when my son starts talking about girls. Right now, he thinks they’re gross. Let’s see how long that lasts.
    Jackie recently posted..A moment that made me melt

  15. Robin @ Farewell, Stranger
    Twitter: FarewellStrangr

    Oh geez! That would be the hard thing about having a girl. Or is it just as bad with a boy. I don’t know. I’m in denial.
    Robin @ Farewell, Stranger recently posted..On the Move: Being a Scary Mommy

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      I only have girls so I have no idea what it’s like to go through this with boys but I can’t imagine it being fun.

  16. Bridget
    Twitter: Twinisms

    Stop brushing her hair and teeth. Refuse to let her wear make-up, ever. Lock the doors.

    It only gets worse…
    Bridget recently posted..Bite This: Not Your Mom’s Tuna Casserole

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      What’s funny is she already stopped brushing her hair. She thinks it makes her look cuter. It doesn’t.

  17. cam says:

    that conversation is why i’m terrified of having a daughter!
    cam recently posted..Little Things

  18. My Inner Chick
    Twitter: krrobi

    just wait until they are teenagers like mine! ohhh, Boy!
    My Inner Chick recently posted..65 Red Roses. The Blog That Broke Me Open

  19. Alexandra says:

    This is one thing…

    the next thing…nursing their broken hearts.

    Yours hurts more than theirs does.

    Alexandra recently posted..Friday Funny

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      I don’t want to even think about the broken hearts yet. I remember that pain from high school and it was terrible.

  20. amanda austin
    Twitter: Amandaaustin

    This is exactly why I was so glad to find out we were having a boy! Althought I’m sure ill get my fair share of relationship drama with him too.
    amanda austin recently posted..Tailgreating

  21. Mad Woman behind the Blog
    Twitter: madwomandiary

    I think it was the summer before seventh grade, the boy I had been hanging out with all day was about to school me on the ways of the french when the security flood light came on.
    My point: adopt and older brother for the Monkey.
    Or put her in a convent.

    If my daughter is ANYTHING like me, I am SO SCREWED.

    So, good luck!
    Mad Woman behind the Blog recently posted..Wordless Wednesday: Challenge

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      I think I’ll start taking applications for an older brother on Monday.

      You should do the same for your daughter.

  22. Kimberly
    Twitter: MamasMonologues

    I am SO not prepared for that! My oldest just started talking to me about being interested in girls. He’s a few years older than your daughter, but still, we’ll never be ready.
    Kimberly recently posted..The Tourist

  23. Barbara
    Twitter: babspinfrance

    Why does 6th grade seem so young all of a sudden. I guess I had my first “boyfriend” in 6th grade, but I don’t think I’m ready for my son to have a girlfriend at that age! Yikes, I’m not prepared for this part of parenting!! What did your husband say? Is the shotgun ready?
    Barbara recently posted..Drumroll please…

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      My husband is glad we live in a state that has very good gun laws. He has his shotgun ready and he is practicing opening the front door with it in his hands.

  24. JDaniel4's Mom says:

    He will probably think 25 is the right age for a boyfriend.

  25. Kir
    Twitter: thekircorner

    Oh the crushes of little girs and ‘big girls’ LOL I can understand not being ready. My boys have girlfriends…and they are 3..the whole daycare knows. God help me. ;)
    Kir recently posted..WOE: Kimmy & Marco: Meanwhile…In Italy

  26. Kimberly says:

    My three year old has a girlfriend and her name is Daphne…from Scooby Doo…
    Kimberly recently posted..It’s Your Birthday And I May Cry If I Need To

  27. Dana K
    Twitter: TheDanaK

    L O L

    This is definitely worth sharing. You are in for some fun times, Mama!
    Dana K recently posted..Top 5 Reasons Bacon Makes Me Cry

  28. Eve
    Twitter: EverythingEvie

    Oh Lord, thank God I have a boy!!
    Eve recently posted..The Cool Kids’ Table – Finding My Happy Place

  29. Leighann says:

    I just realized that I was playing kissing tag in grade 2.
    My child is never leaving the house.
    Leighann recently posted..Let Me Tweet You a Story

  30. Christi says:

    Oh no! My daughter just started 6th grade! No boyfriend yet, but there is a definite crush…

  31. By Word of Mouth Musings
    Twitter: ByWordsMusings

    My 13 yr old has no interest in boys, my 9 yr old is convinced they all love her ;)
    By Word of Mouth Musings recently posted..UNDER CONSTRUCTION

  32. Janie
    Twitter: janie_real

    Uh oh, you have 2 girls! Daddy’s going to be busy
    I don’t think I’ll ever be ready for this part of growing up too!
    Janie recently posted..Caught Red Handed

  33. Haha, oh my gosh…I know the feeling. I’m not ready for that either!

  34. liz says:

    OK, and I am not joking in the least, but when I got Maddie up this morning, she told me that her “boyfriend” still pees in his Pull-Up.
    liz recently posted..I Graduated and Never Looked Back

  35. Stasha
    Twitter: NorthWestMommy

    Yep, this one I would pass it on to Daddy too…
    I never had a boyfriend. In fact I did not exist until I met my husband :)
    Stasha recently posted..Just the three of us

  36. Allie
    Twitter: allierambles

    OH!!!! My daughter just started 6th grade. Tonight is her first dance. I’m not liking that she wants to go so badly. I know it is to hang out with her friends but still…

    I have a 12 yo son, I tried to bribe him into going but he won’t budge. My friend’s son (13) is going, maybe I’ll bribe him to watch her. Right now he treats her like a little sister.

    I told my daughter no boyfriends until further notice. Maybe I should tell her when she gets all A’s (she’s not an A student and works damn hard for B’s) Do you think that would work? ;-)
    Allie recently posted..Versatile Blogger Award: Thank You Lady Bren

  37. Courtney @ The Mommy Matters
    Twitter: MrsMommyMatters

    They start early these days, don’t they? I’m hoping I can convince my son that growing up isn’t always all that its cracked up to be. And he should enjoy being little. Because I am SO NOT ready for the dating thing to begin…
    Courtney @ The Mommy Matters recently posted..Why is Faith Hard?!

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      If only our kids would believe us that they should enjoy being little. I bet our parents thought the same thing.

  38. Mommy's Paradise
    Twitter: mommysparadise

    Gha, I’m so not ready for this. I had a similar talk (actually a lot ‘worse’) with the 10year old neighbor girl and she wanted my advice about her hanging out or even sleeping over at her ‘boy-friend’s house. I was actually pretty shocked and told her from ‘girl to girl’ that I wouldn’t do this if I were her. And I know that her parents would never allow it anyway, but soon they are going to face a hard time.
    These things make me really happy ‘Timan’ is a boy. And they say boys are two years behind, right? So I still have many many years ahead of me and when the time comes, it’s the Hubs job to have the ‘man to man’ talk.
    Mommy’s Paradise recently posted..My tots quirks are driving me nuts sometimes

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      You gave that 10 year old girl some really good advice. She should not be sleeping over at any boy’s house.

  39. Jess
    Twitter: jessesco

    Oh my gosh. I’m not ready either. I’m just behind y’all so I will need guidance! Ay ay ay!

  40. Hopes@Staying Afloat!
    Twitter: HStayingAfloat

    While I don’t have daughters, I’m not ready for my boys to come home all akward about girls. It’s just starting with my oldest. He’s noticing girls are different then he is and acting like a doofus. I’m afraid it won’t be long. Definitely not as long as I’d like
    Hopes@Staying Afloat! recently posted..What Would Make My Life As A Busy Mom Easier?

  41. Theresa
    Twitter: amountainmomma

    Mine 5 year old is already trying to surreptitiously set up dates/weddings with boys. God help me, I am not ready.
    Theresa recently posted..Don’t Worry About it Momma {Wednesday Words of Wisdom}

  42. Anne says:

    Just you wait until 6th grade! Everyone in my little one’s first grade class last year knew that she and Jacob loved each other. We’re not even finished with the first week at a new school in a new city and she’s already picked her man for the year. Harrison. Cute name. I gotta give her that.
    Anne recently posted..Eleven Years

  43. jacqui
    Twitter: chicktuition

    I don’t envy you this. Kids grow up way too fast now. I’ve told my nieces they might as well not have boyfriends because they can’t date until 16. Luckily, their parents feel the same way or I would be overruled.
    jacqui recently posted..It’s A Fashion Show…

  44. Aleta says:

    If my husband and I had a daughter, she wouldn’t date until she was 25. Hehe. I know, reality is a lot different.
    Aleta recently posted..Happiness is Blogging

  45. Gina
    Twitter: firefam5

    UMMM- yeah. A couple years ago when my older daughter was about 8 – she made a “love note” for one of the boys in her brother’s scout group. I was NOT PLEASED. Not only did I have to have the conversation about how to not settle & to set the bar a bit higher & not choose someone based on the fact that they happen to be there- but I had to explain that 8 is not exactly mature enough to have a boyfriend. I couldn’t believe I had to do this with her. Not looking forward to having to fight the boys off in the coming years. I know their tricks- it’s now my job to teach my girls about them so they know when a guy is a dirtbag. :)
    Gina recently posted..The Last Crazy Day of Summer

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      I hope you caught the loe note before she actually gave it to the boy. My daughter turns 8 in 2 months. I’m not ready for her to do that.

  46. Oh wow! I am so not looking forward to this. My daughter is already boy crazy and she is just going into first grade. Luckily my 10 year old son still thinks girls are icky. I don’t even know what I would say if he came up to me and said he had a girlfriend. I didn’t have a boyfriend until I was a sophomore in high school.
    Jayme (RandomBlogette) recently posted..A Dancer’s Body

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      Good luck to you with your daughter. Hopefully she gets some girl friends in school that don’t like boys and she follows their lead.

  47. Bruna
    Twitter: beeswithhoney

    What a cute conversation.
    My 13 year-old has not yet had a boyfriend.
    She’s liked boys but nothing has evolved.
    I’m happy.
    Bruna recently posted..life lessons: what this summer gave us

  48. Galit Breen
    Twitter: galitbreen

    I have two reactions-

    My sappy side says Awwww!

    And my Mama side says Nooo!

    I’m so glad that you decided to share this one!
    Galit Breen recently posted..Tweet a Story

  49. Kristy @PampersandPinot
    Twitter: PampersandPinot

    We’ll never be ready for it, right? Hopefully, having a boyfriend at her age means that he simple checked “yes” in a box and SOMETIMES sits by her in the lunch room!
    Kristy @PampersandPinot recently posted..Ruthless

  50. Lindsey @ Campfire Song
    Twitter: dashingly

    Definitely not looking forward to that. I hope i have several years to go.
    I didn’t even take an interest in boys until I was about 13. And I wasn’t allowed to date until 16.
    Lindsey @ Campfire Song recently posted..Back up the future.

  51. I was so boy crazy. I hope Donut is more sensible. Probably not. The words I dread? “But mama, I love him.”
    Rach (DonutsMama) recently posted..Life’s Lessons: Let’s Go To the Movies!

  52. Poppy
    Twitter: funnyorsnot

    Oh man. My middle kid is the same age and oh is she boy crazy too! My 8th grader was a late bloomer thank goodness, but game on now. If only they wait until 24 like we did, ha!
    Poppy recently posted..Off White Wedding

  53. Jen {at} take2mommy
    Twitter: take2mommy

    Interesting. If I imagine that I’m a mom of a 7YO girl who’s excited about dating, I feel nauseous. But as you know my 7YO is a boy. And the thought of him having a girlfriend in 6th grade doesn’t freak me out too much.
    What did freak me out was something that happened the FIRST week of 1st grade, a year ago. My 7YO came home and said,
    “Mom? Eliana says she is my girlfriend, and I can’t talk to other girls, and there is no such thing as Santa or the Easter Bunny.”
    That threw me off my chair!
    Jen {at} take2mommy recently posted..Summer Bucket Lists, Little Man Style

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      I would be having a talk with Eliana about a whole lot of things if I was you. I can’t believe she spilled the beans about Santa and the Easter bunny and told him he couldn’t talk to other girls.

  54. Nichole
    Twitter: nicholebeaudry

    Keep fighting the good fight!
    I’m taking notes, because I’ll be needing your advice before I know it.
    Nichole recently posted..Defeat

  55. Kid Id says:

    Man, as a parent of a precocious 2-year-old diva, this terrifies me. Here I was thinking, well, at least I’ve got 10 more years without having to worry about boy stuff. According to this, I can expect it in as little as 4? Don’t tell my husband – he might pass out.
    Kid Id recently posted..Monday Blues (and Blacks and Browns)

  56. Tonya says:

    When you tweeted about this last week I totally misunderstood… I thought the person that no longer blogger anymore wrote a post for you that you never published and then quit blogging themselves. that’s why my advice was to make sure with them that it was okay to publish on your site. I didn’t realize it was a piece you wrote for them.

    At any rate… I’m not ready for this stuff either and Lucas is ONLY 2 but it seems kids these days are growing up a lot faster than we did. Good luck with each and every transition and boy crush. :)
    Tonya recently posted..The Summer That Was

    • Jessica D Torres says:

      I would never publish someone else’s stuff without asking first. But since it was something I wrote I didn’t contact them.

      The kids do seem to grow up fast. My oldest is in second grade and I can’t believe it sometimes. I just hope she quits thinking about boys.

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